“It’s Hard, Life’s Hard”
We have often said and heard many others say “Life is hard.”
There are two kinds of hard.
One is that which comes our way not of our choosing. Those are the events sent for our growth. They may not be what we want, but they are what we need.
Then there is the hard that we choose. Without spending too much precious time on the why we choose the hard, let’s focus on how we can make better choices?
Before every decision, move, or action ask yourself if it will lead you towards your purpose or goal? If it will benefit and lift up another or others, you’re headed in the right direction. There are many signs on your road giving you directions. Pay attention.
“Life is 10% how you make it, and 90% how you take it.” – Irving Berlin
“Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.” – Randy Pausch, The Last Lecture
“May you use all of your possibilities for the benefit of many.” – The Rebbe
A Quick Thought That Deserves Lots of Thought
“It is vital that people count their blessings, to appreciate what they possess without having to undergo its actual loss.” – Abraham Maslow
I Can, I Can (cont’d)
While you can’t be Einstein he can’t be you either. Every one of us has something that only we can do to its utmost. It is given to us to use for the completion of our mission. When we use it properly it benefits all. It’s not “use it or lose it” but use it or we all lose! Remembering that reminds you that you matter.
“The mind of each man is as unique as his face.” — Talmud
I Can, I Can
A recent study says that there are those born to be better than others at math. Whether or not this is a scientifically valid study is not the issue. What is at issue is the misleading nature of the study. For many, many years we have been fed a mechanistic view of humanity by the most famous psychiatrists and social scientists. Carol Dweck in her book “Mindset” calls this the “fixed mindset”. While some may be more “gifted” in math doesn’t mean that the others can’t improve their math skills. We can’t all be Einstein (relatively speaking), but we can continually grow and improve at everything we do. Sing along again “Anything I can do I can do better” adapted from “Annie Get Your Gun”.
“What I can’t do today, I can do tomorrow.” – Gabrielle Mariotta —- elderly tailor who said this while rehabbing from a major stroke
A Quick Thought That Deserves Lots of Thought
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” – Dr. Viktor Frankl
from his book “Man’s Search for Meaning” from his observations of others and personal experience while interned at Auschwitz
Forgiveness and Your Future
In the Biblical story of Joseph we learn of his magnanimous forgiveness. Joseph had been thrown into a pit and then sold into slavery by his jealous brothers.
He spent years in prison and eventually became a ruler in Egypt under Pharaoh. Twenty years later when reunited with his brothers he harbored no resentment and told them to not be sad over what they had done to him.
He understood and explained to them that he wouldn’t be where he was without this journey imposed upon him. He had faith that all that happened was for the good. He was able to move forward to great accomplishments because that faith allowed him to let go of the anchor of anger, grudges, or resentment.
“Anger begins with madness and ends with regret.” – Ben Hamelech V’Hanazir
“Don’t carry a grudge. While you’re carrying a grudge the other guy is dancing.” – Buddy Hackett
“Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies.” – Rebbetzin Feige Twerski
Part of the If You Are Always Looking Back, Then Your Future Will Look Like Your Past series
Kvetching
We often we spend too much time analyzing the past in order to understand how we arrived where and who we are today. Often that leads to blame, which leads to anger, and self-pity.
If we have gotten into a hole this only digs it deeper. A more productive use of time and energy would be to find the light and start climbing out.
If a football player fumbles the ball does he sit down and kvetch or does he try to recover the ball and keep gaining yardage?
“If we open a quarrel between the past and the present, we will find that we have lost the future.” – Winston Churchill
“Agony is but an instinct, the indulgence of agony is a blunder of a lifetime.” – Benjamin Disraeli
Part of If you are always looking back, then your future will look like your past series
The Spinning Rabbi - Heart & Soul 